Growth: Not For the Faint of Heart

“What seems to get in the way is the way to transformation.”

-Taryn Watts

Hello friends,

This week I've been in a contraction- a big one. And it totally kicked my ass.

Let me explain.

I've learned that our life is made up of expansions and contractions. And they are absolutely necessary for us to grow.

Expansions are when life is good, you feel alive and in flow. Contractions are life's hardships. They suck. They don't feel good in your body. But they are here to teach us something. And when we view the world from this lens, it changes the way we live our lives

Taryn Watts, founder of The Mind Rebel Academy, explains it like this: "Inside the expansions, you will feel utter joy, bliss and love as you tap into the fullness of who you are. Inside the contractions, you will experience the exact opposite: limiting beliefs and old ways of being that no longer serve you or belong inside the version of you that you're growing into. These contractions are your opportunities to heal; to choose again; to show up differently; to alter beliefs; to choose love; to trust the unfolding transformation."

These contractions in our lives are not unlike the contractions we experience when giving birth. They suck, they hurt and the closer you are to giving birth, often the bigger they become.

The details of my contraction this week are not important. Something happened.. it hurt, caused icky feelings in my body, made it hard to be present with my family and fall asleep at night. But now, seeing it through this framework, I know that a contraction this big means I am closer to the birth of a new way of being.

And I see it. I feel it. I feel a rumbling stirring deep down in my soul. The slow build of momentum. Pieces of my vision coming together

The shifts in my life are subtle, each one a tiny piece, but they are accumulating, coming together, adding up.. and the fruits of my labor, the seeds that have germinated in my dreams, are starting to sprout.

I have been so afraid. So afraid for so long.

Afraid of what people will think, who I might lose in my life. And I've been afraid of failure of course- isn't everyone?

Isn't it that failure that keeps our dreams pushed down inside of us, where they are safe? Where no one can laugh at them, judge them or crush them?

If they dare poke their existence into our minds we "shh" them back down deep, a place nobody can take that dream and use it to hurt us.

But I'm tired of living this way. I'm tired of telling myself "no, you can't do that because... (insert whatever excuse your mind is telling you at that moment)."

Brenè Brown teaches us that when we live a life of authenticity, showing people on the outside who we are on the inside, we WILL get our asses kicked.

She writes, "If you show up and are seen, if you go into the arena, if you create, if you want to be courageous, you WILL get your ass kicked- that is the one guarantee."

And you know what? This week I did.

And you also know what? I am just fine.

Actually more than fine- because although getting the shit kicked out of us hurts for a moment, and it did, it also teaches us something

This week it taught me that I am strong, that I can do this work. I can put myself and my dreams and my vision out into the world, get the shit kicked out of me, and STILL be ok. I'm still safe. I still have my home and my family and my incredible group of supporters cheering me on. I am still living a life filled with love and connection and purpose.

When I look at it this way, I can see that this contraction is actually setting me free.

I feel more empowered, stronger, bolder, less afraid.

I will get my ass kicked.. and I will still be ok.

And that my friends, is what freedom feels like. And let me tell you.. it feels pretty damn sweet.

___

Say love my friends,
Caitlin